Unlike my sourdough starter, we are doing relatively well. Two weeks of the house and garden. No walks. Perhaps a bit extreme for many but I can’t take risks…. Not because I am particularly concerned about dying. Frankly, I don’t give a damn. But I can’t go knowing that, should the worst happen, my boys will be left without their mum. As simple as that. I am responsible for their lives and so it is my job to ensure that we all get through without extremes.

Our days changed a little compared to the previous week. The late nights swallowed most of the early mornings, though nobody seems to be complaining. Pups still wake up at 6 for their breakfast and garden, but then return to bed for a snooze… And the extra two hours in the morning allow me to nourish the aftermath of my anxiety-induced insomnia.

At night I lie in bed inhaling the scent of Fred’s forehead and stroking Coop’s back. I watch movies until Fred starts to fidget and tells me off for the flashes of light and sound.  I hug him, and eventually fall into abyss of most vivid dreams. Somehow (and I have no idea why) I always feel that I will wake up to the new day where the world is free from the virus and the nightmare. I feel that not sleeping all night will bring this day closer at a much faster speed.

Then we wake up slightly blinded by the bright sunshine and the reality of “sameness”, get dressed (well, relatively) and walk into the garden for our morning training and play time. It takes us about an hour to work on the issues that need attention, learn something new, play, sniff, practise the old tricks and simply sit outside on a porch listening to birds whilst Fred feasts on dandelion leaves.

Afterwards, I still groom them as usual, as if we were out and got muddy paws.

I know the pups miss their walks, but they seem very, very content with our current activities. They are relaxed, happy, playful, so much so that they happily go for a nap mid-morning and allow me to continue with my studies and reading until late lunch.

After lunch we do everything all over again, cook dinner, play, and relax. Well, they relax whilst I often go back to my computer and dive back into my course work.

I have been inventing new puzzle toys and games for them, too. Will need to do a proper post about this as the list is getting longer. I won’t lie, it can get labour-intensive at times. Once every few days I get to the point when I just want to sit and watch TV for hours doing absolutely nothing. If I didn’t have the boys – I would… But they come to over for a hug or a kiss, bearing a toy or asking for a little bit of training outside. So I get off my bottom and do what every mum is supposed to do: make a cup of coffee to perk up – and leave it to go cold because I am outside entertaining the troops.

But that’s ok. It’s all ok. I only hope that we will soon get a glimmer of hope for better things to come.

Image source: Fred photographed by me